I Don't Like Rum (But Maybe I Like You)
by BaronessBlixen
Summary: Set right after 03x05: Emma and Regina share a moment together. One-shot.


**A/N**: My first attempt at Swan Queen. I did have a slightly different idea, but then the episode came along and destroyed it. So I wrote this instead (and it turned out completely different still). I'd really love to know what you think! Enjoy.

* * *

The alcohol settled in Emma's bloodstream and made everything look a little less… dreadful. She had hardly eaten that day (who had the time? At least Mary Margaret always made sure Emma ate at least something and stayed hydrated) which gave the alcohol an advantage. At the moment however it did not matter. Emma needed this moment of what almost felt like peace. Henry was still out there with Pan, but at least they had managed to get a message through to him. Her father had been in danger, but Hook saved him. As strange as it seemed. Something told Emma that the story the two men had told them wasn't exactly the truth. She could almost feel it. Just the way David had said goodbye to them proved that there was something more to it. He seemed fine now and Emma was glad. Pan's words were always on her mind: "You won't just feel like an orphan, you'll be one". She had come close to losing yet another person today. She was sick of losing. What she wanted right now was to steal Hook's flask and get stupidly drunk. She knew it wouldn't help; not really anyway. There was just something about this island that made her want to return to all of those old habits. Nasty ones, stupid ones. With her mind on the rocks she would never be able to find Henry and beat Pan. That was out of the question. Not to mention that she wasn't in the mood to face Hook. That kiss… she hadn't planned it. Part of her blamed the alcohol. The other part was the one she thought she'd left behind. Sex, just like alcohol, was so tremendously easy. She had just wanted to give him a taste of his own medicine. Granted, the guy could kiss and she had almost lost herself in the sensation. It was such a grand feeling to be wanted by someone. But she knew why she was here and Hook wasn't part of that.

Emma wanted to stay as far away from her parents as possible. They were worse than a couple of teenagers in love. She wasn't the only one trying to get away from the delirious happiness. Regina was all by herself when Emma approached her. In the past Emma would have just kept on walking. But this was just as hard for Regina as it was for her. It had taken some time, but she had accepted the fact that Henry was their son. Not just hers and not just Regina's; he was theirs.

"Hey." She said and sat down close to her.

"Don't you want to celebrate the fact that your boyfriend saved your father?" Regina asked in a voice laced with slight disgust.

"Hook is not my boyfriend." Emma mumbled angrily and kicked at a stone.

"Well, I think he would disagree."

"What are you talking about?" Regina couldn't possibly know about the kiss they'd shared. Hook was many things, but he wasn't so stupid as to walk around and tell everyone what had happened between them.

"I guess it doesn't matter," Regina sighed, "I don't care anyway. I just-" Emma turned to look at her when she didn't continue. Her expression was not easy to gauge in the darkness. If she didn't know any better, she would have thought Regina felt something akin to… jealousy. Only that there was no reason to be jealous. They were all in this together; Emma knew how reluctant Regina was to ally with them. But in the end they were a kind of family. After all, this was about saving their son.

"I can't believe Henry was this close to losing hope." She finally admitted. It came out in a mumble as if reluctant to let even the slightest form of vulnerability slip. Emma sat more upright. She knew what it was like to lose hope. To live without feeling like anything mattered. Hadn't Regina felt the same once? Instead of clinging to hope that she could change her life she had destroyed it. Moments like that made Emma remember that Regina in many ways was still the enemy. Without her interference Emma would never have grown up without her parents. She never would have known what this felt like; this emptiness that came from loneliness. Then again there would have been no Henry. She was beginning to put everything behind her – as she always did – and concentrate on what was important. Henry was important; he had become the crucial part of her life. And yet while she had given birth to him, she hadn't seen him grow up. Regina had. So whatever Emma was feeling, it had to be harder for Regina. She kept losing Henry too. Her ray of hope. Her chance at love.

"But he didn't, Regina. That's what's important." Emma surprised both of them when she took Regina's hand. Somehow it just felt right. Maybe it was the alcohol that made her so bold. Maybe she just wanted to forget all the things Regina had done in the past to make her life miserable. The truth was she was here and no one else understood how much that moment of seeing Henry, of talking to him had meant.

"He hurt that boy. I never thought he…" Regina's voice broke and Emma felt so close to the other woman all of a sudden. She liked to hide between sassy remarks (and Emma knew what that was like as well), but in the end this was a woman who was capable of love. Emma pushed everything aside; all the lives Regina had destroyed, the lives she'd taken and the misery she might cause Emma and her family again in the future. She was so close to her and she wanted to be closer. Somehow it felt as if being close to Regina was being close to Henry. So Emma hugged her. It was a strange feeling; awkward and almost repulsing. Yet it felt incredibly right.

"What are you doing?" Regina pushed her away, but almost gently. She got up from the tree trunk she'd been sitting on and crossed her arms in front of her. Defenses up. Emma almost smiled, but she couldn't deny that she already missed the unknown warmth she'd just felt. It's the alcohol, she told herself. The taste of rum, mixed with the taste of Hook, was still prominent on her tongue.

"I just… it felt right."

"Go hug your parents. Or your boyfriend."

"For the last time he's not my boyfriend!"

Regina just looked at her and her eyes were so very dark. They intrigued Emma. But the anger she saw in them matched her own. They were like a mirror and somehow she just wanted to spend some more time lost in that sensation. The air around them crackled and Regina startled. Suddenly she was closer to Emma again, who felt the warmth. All she wanted this night was warmth. She had tried to find a piece of it with Hook. And he'd been fine, but he wasn't part of this. He was on the periphery of what Emma and Regina were feeling. Henry wasn't his son. He was Regina and Emma's. Now that Henry had lost his father… they were all he had left.

"And why do you even care?" Emma asked daringly.

"Any man you date is part of my son's life, Ms. Swan."

"Our son," Emma reminded her.

"Whatever."

"Henry just lost Neal. I just… lost Neal. Hook is not my boyfriend. He won't ever be my boyfriend." She said it like a promise. Maybe she even meant it as such. The look Regina gave her was tiring. The heavy cloak of the alcohol finally settled over her. She needed to sleep (preferably as far away from her parents as possible). Without another word she passed Regina and then the other woman suddenly reached for her. A hand closed around her arm. Warm, no, hot. Like fire. Almost. The hand tugged at her gently as if asking permission, but she wasn't really asking. Emma's head started spinning and then she felt a set of lips on hers. She tried to catch her breath and couldn't, so she just surrendered. Regina's lips were so much softer than Hook's. They were softer than Emma ever could have imagined. She was used to men with five o'clock shadows. She was accustomed to the gentle burning they caused. This was so, so different. Was this even happening? Emma wondered. She'd had alcohol. Maybe this was merely a dream. Just as her lips opened, ready to fall deeper the kiss ended as abruptly as it had begun. Emma was frozen in place. She watched as Regina slowly walked away.

"I just wanted to feel something else for a moment." Emma thought she'd heard her say, but she couldn't be sure and her lips wouldn't form words anymore. They tingled hotly with the remnants of Regina's taste and her passion. When she was able to move again moments later her finger touched her bottom lip. It felt burnt, but in a good way. As she walked back to their camp she glared at Regina, who had her back turned to her. The tingling returned and took possession of Emma's whole body. She couldn't make sense of what had happened that night; first Hook and then Regina. Before she lay down herself, she shook her head as if to get out all these conflicting feelings.

"We'll find you, Henry," she whispered into the night sky and stole one last look at Regina,

"we'll find you and then we'll find a way to make all of this work."

**The End**


End file.
